Happy Sunday!
And welcome to today's edition of 'Conscious living with Purnima'. In today's post I talk about the hindrances we face on our journey to realizing our goals.
Let me know which of these you have encountered :)
There is enough said about cause and effect both in science (Newton's 3rd law) and spirituality (law of Karma).
Most of us understand that to achieve something (result/effect) we have to do (cause) something. The problem we face is in the execution of those things we know we should do.
In this post I will talk about 5 hindrances that we may encounter in our efforts to see results.
1. Chasing after results & desires:
This can induce feelings of anxiety, stress, and all things that don't feel good. Ever experienced?
I will share a quote from the book, "Man's Search for Meaning" that addresses this predicament. It's a quote I love and revisit often. It goes:
"Don't aim at success - the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success like happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue & it only does so as the unintended side effect of one's dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as a by-product of one's surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, & the same holds for success; you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do & go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long run success will follow you precisely because you have forgotten to think of it."
We care so much about success and results, isn't it? And that can be a hindrance.
2. Aversion to doing things that are necessary to be done:
To give an example from my own life, I work for myself but am averse to selling. Truth is, it doesn't matter what I like or dislike. If it's my intention to impact more lives or grow my business then I ‘have to’ find a way to deal with my aversion. Else I won't see results.
3. Laziness:
Obvious one but deserves a mention. Laziness never brought any good. To get results we know we need to put in the work.
4. Restlessness & Lack of faith:
This can manifest as not giving ourselves sufficient time to learn and doubting our actions, jumping from one path to another with the hope that the new path is better.
This not only delays result but also leads to frustration and confusion.
5. Not paying attention to our unique tendencies & life situations:
I have realised that every setback in terms of achieving goals can be traced to one of these 3 areas:
A. Mindset:
Getting influenced by other people's voice is common. We lose ourselves, our values, nature & needs, even doubt ourselves based on other people's estimate of what we can or cannot do. Self-doubt, imposter syndrome, cultural conditioning all come under this.
I will share a quote from the book Mastery that I like to revisit every time I feel challenged with a new skill. It goes:
"If you could learn to touch your forehead, you can learn to play a Beethoven Sonata or fly a jet plane, to be a better manager or improve your relationships. Our current society works in many ways to lead us astray, but the path of mastery is always there waiting for us."
We need a positive mindset like that to remain unfettered.
Yesterday I found this really cute video created by ‘Stanford Medicine’ on "Imposter Syndrome". It’s a short video but deep. Do take a look:
Imposter Syndrome. You are not alone.
It's important for us to discover our unique mindset issues and find a way to deal with them.
B. Habits:
To give my own life example, whenever I have my phone next to my meal, I am tempted to check it every time there is a notification. So, I consciously keep it away so I can eat mindfully. Eating mindfully helps me manage my portions and enjoy my meal - results that matter to me.
The point I am trying to make is that recognition of habits that don't serve us is important. And these habits can be very personal. If we unconsciously strengthen them with repetition, then they become big hindrances.
C. Environment:
Sometimes we are not in the right environment to get the results we seek. Maybe we have unsupportive people, an unstimulating and depressing surrounding. It's important to face this truth & have the courage to call it out.
Constantly swimming upstream can get tiring. And at some point, we have to stop. Because there are only 2 choices under such a circumstance: Either to give up on our goals or take action by pulling ourselves out and finding an environment where we can feel nourished.
One last but important consideration:
No matter how much we achieve by doing the right things and overcoming hindrances, the hedonistic adaptation will always be at play, and we will never feel like we have attained enough.
Also understand that all the people who we think are living our unlived life, have made tradeoffs that we don’t see. Tradeoffs that we probably don't want to make with ours.
Knowing these things we should choose our goals wisely. Our goals should help us grow, evolve and be a better human. Those are the only worthy goals, in my opinion. Rest all is mindless pandering after what can never gratify us.
Enjoyed the article, well articulated. The link to the video was also very relatable and connected to the theme.
Thank you for this wonderful reminder. I think point 2 and 4 is what I keep battling most of the time. But what brings me back is the thought that to me, success means to experience all that life has to offer to me with grace. It's a measure of how gracefully I handle life. You summed it up beautifully - "Our goals should help us grow, evolve and be a better human" ❤️