You can call it meditation or simply sitting. A practice that can have a transformative effect on various aspects of your life.
Sitting quietly for a few minutes isn't as easy as it sounds.
Last month, I got my class to begin this practice by sitting quietly for just 5 minutes every day. Out of a class of 40, about 4 or 5 managed to do this consistently. Shows us just how difficult this is.
But, don't lose heart. Difficult is good. Any difficulty that you surmount, makes you grow. So instead of feeling disheartened, see it as an opportunity for personal growth.
In this post, I will examine the reasons why we might find sitting quietly challenging, the benefits of a regular sitting practice, what we may experience when we begin, & finally a roadmap to get you started and stay consistent.
Reasons why a sitting practice is challenging:
A. The lopsided emphasis our culture places on "doing" over "being" : While doing is necessary ( survival, right? ), so is just being. We may think, sitting quietly "doing nothing" is a waste of our time. A time better spent doing & accomplishing some more. Nothing can be further from the truth.
“Doing nothing often leads to the very best of something.” - Winnie the pooh
B. An overactive mind : Sitting quietly can seem impossible, when the mind is constantly thinking, analysing, planning, worrying etc.
“The heaviest burdens we carry are the thoughts in our heads.”
C. Getting caught up with life : Amidst all the busy activities, it may become difficult to take time out for a sitting practice that doesn't give us an immediate feedback / gratification or result in a tangible benefit.
“You should sit in meditation for 20 minutes a day, unless you're too busy; then you should sit for an hour.” - An old Zen saying
D. Lack of faith in what a sitting practice can do for us : Just like any other habit, like say a daily exercise habit, one needs to feel the motivation from within, & have faith in the process.
“Somewhere something incredible is waiting to be known" - Carl Sagan
Benefits of a sitting practice : I will share with you benefits that I have personally experienced:
1. Increased awareness : Sitting quietly with ourselves, heightens our awareness. Awareness of what is important for us - our personal values, needs, purpose.
“Go into your own room and get the Upanishads out of your own self. You are the greatest book that ever was or ever will be, the infinite depository of all that is. Untill, the inner teacher opens, all outside teaching is in vain.” - Swami Vivekananda
2. Ability to pause : A regular sitting practice, enables us to pause more often, not only when we are triggered but also at other times when we need to make some important decision.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” - Victor E Frankl
3. Greater clarity : A sitting practice brings more clarity to what's important for us, what serves us and what does not. We are able to stop imagining things and see reality for what it is.
“An untroubled mind, no longer seeking to consider what is right, and what is wrong, a mind beyond judgements, watches and understands.” - Buddha
4. Calm & composed disposition : By enabling the tendency to slow down and pause, we are able to exude a more calm and composed personality.
5. Enhanced creativity : Quiet times have often brought me many creative ideas that I could apply into my life and reap benefits.
I do not know from where or how these ideas arise. But my guess is, it comes from a clear mind.
“The quieter you become, the more you are able to hear.” - Rumi
6. Ability to let go : As humans we tend to cling and grasp a lot - of certain ideas / notions, people etc. A regular sitting practice brings us face to face with this clinging and helps us see more clearly how our attitude does not serve us. It enables letting go.
“Everything changes once we identify with being the witness to the story, instead of the actor in it “ - Ram Dass
7. Opens heart : I have noticed for myself, that a regular sitting practice makes me more loving, and accepting of myself as well as others. I am able to see from other people's perspective and be a lot less judgemental. Also I feel the urge to be more supportive and kind to those who come into my life. A daily sitting practice makes me a better person. A value that is important for me.
“Meditation is like giving a hug to ourselves, getting in touch with that awesome reality in us. While meditating we feel a deep sense of intimacy with God, a love that is inexplicable.” - Paramhamsa Yogananda
Following are a few lines that my very consistent students penned about their regular sitting practice:
"Just sitting quietly for five-ten minutes daily helped me to calm down from the daily hustle and bustle of activities. It also helped me to slow down. I tend to habitually get into the mode of thinking about what to do next. Constantly ticking off the top ‘to do list’ in my mind. But sitting practice helps the thoughts to settle down and to connect with my inner world." - Trupti
“My day involves dealing with many demands - office work, housework, managing late night meetings etc. A regular sitting practice is time for myself where I can breathe slowly at a constant pace. This helps me slow down the wavering of thoughts, and brings my anxiety down, enables me to clear out conflicting thoughts and fills me with gratitude for the positives in life. At the end of 20 minutes, mind becomes calm and clear.” - Vinotha
“I have been regular with a sitting practice of minimum 5 minutes a day since the beginning of June. I find that this helps me feel more relaxed and my mind is calm. It has also helped to improve the quality of my sleep. In just 30 days, I can experience this. I am sure there are many more benefits to come.” - Manjusha
“A dedicated few minutes at the end of the day is my time for the sitting practice. Firstly, it has helped improve my discipline. I get to totally unwind and call the day done. This has been a mindful activity for me to speak to myself, assimilate and reflect on the day that has gone by, and prepare for the upcoming day. I have been able to have a clarity of thought and plan well for the next day at work and home, and set reminders and prompts. Best so far, the practice has helped improve my sleep pattern. Maybe the mind is without many thoughts and I fall asleep almost immediately, and thereby wake up fresh and prepared. Not that I am free of thoughts during the practice, but certainly am able to move away from them sooner and focus on me and my body at that instant, mindfully. I am glad that I was able to adapt to this practice sooner than I thought and am positive of keeping this on as a healthy living practice.”- Deepa
What to expect when kick-starting a sitting practice :
A. A sitting practice will force you to face your own thoughts and sometimes turbulent emotions. Not being used to doing this, you might feel restless and uncomfortable.
B. One minute may seem like one hour. You may have put an alarm to indicate the end of your practice and may wonder why it's taking so long for the alarm to ring.
C. You may feel the urge to do a guided meditation practice in place of sitting quietly by yourself.
Please know that all of this is normal. And everyone on this journey goes through them. And you can move beyond this if you stay consistent. Infact, you will progress to reach a stage where you will look forward to your quiet time and even desire to sit longer.
Roadmap to start a sitting practice and stay consistent. Things to do :
A. First be convinced : If you are not convinced about why you should do this, you will struggle to stay consistent. You need to be absolutely certain and feel the need to give this practice a wholehearted shot.
If you are not fully convinced, then don't spend time on it. Let it go. Find other practices that help you center such as being mindful with routine activities or spending time doing those things that get you in a flow state. You can come back to this meditation thing at a later point in life when the urge comes from within.
“The real joy in life comes from finding your true purpose and aligning it with what you do every single day.” - Tony Robbins
B. Once convinced, know that all things are difficult in the beginning : The key to overcome the difficulty is to be consistent in your practice and trust the process. It does get easier with time.
“All things are difficult before they are easy.” - Thomas Fuller
C. Accept the phases : I have mentioned earlier what to expect when just starting out. Know that it's normal and you will pass through this phase.
D. Thought labeling : Everytime a thought comes during your practice, label it as "planning", or "worrying", or "clinging", or "grasping" etc. etc. Naming a thought helps you see it for what it is without becoming it. As you do this, the thought will lose its power to control you and you can begin to watch them arise and fade like passing clouds.
E. No judgement : Practice for the sake of the practice without any expectations. I have some students ask me, “So what should I aim for?”, or “How should I feel after my practice?” or “Am I doing it right ?”
The answer is - Aim for nothing. Just sit. Be done. And carry on with your day. The wisdom of what the practice does will come to you.
There is no right or wrong way of doing this. You cannot go wrong. Trust yourself. Each day will be different. Some days the mind will be calm and some days it will be turbulent. And that's alright. You will learn to watch this turbulence like you would watch the crashing of waves against the rocks on a beach.
“Meditation is to be aware of every thought and of every feeling, never to say it is right or wrong, but just to watch it and to move with it. In that watching you begin to understand the whole movement of thought and feeling. And out of this awareness comes silence.” - Krishnamurthy
F. Prioritise the practice: Set a time and place aside for daily practice and simply show up. Try to get it out of your way, as early as possible without procrastinating or pushing the practice for later time. Ensure you choose a time when you will be alert. I like to do my practice in the morning. See what works for you.
“The key is not to prioritise what's in your schedule but to schedule your priorities.” - Stephen Covey
E. Find an accountability partner : Find a supportive group / friend or a teacher who is also practicing and seeing benefits in the practice. You can check in with each other and motivate each other to stay on the path.
F. Sit shorter or longer duration depending on what feels more comfortable for you : Some of us might take more time to settle into quiet in which case a longer sitting time would work better. While some others might get into a quiet state sooner but start getting restless with longer sitting duration. In which case a shorter sitting time would be better. No two people are the same. So listen to your own body & mind and see what works best, in the beginning. Stay consistent & evolve your sitting time to 20 minutes/day.
G. Maintain a meditation journal : If you like to write, like me, then maintain a small journal where you can record anything that comes up for you. This isn't to judge but just note down anything unusual that pops up, maybe an idea or emotion that surfaces.
I know this has been quite a long post. And that's because it's a topic close to my heart ❤️
Thanks for reading & I sincerely hope you are inspired from it to kick-start your own sitting practice. Leave a message or drop me a mail, if you are ready. I would love to hear from you as well as support you on your journey💕🙂
Good one
Awesome write up. Keep it up Purnima ❤️