Wise Mind Vs Egoic Mind
On my observations & experiments in the laboratory of my life
Happy Friday!
And welcome to today’s edition of ‘Conscious living with Purnima’. In today’s post I want to share with you some of my observations on the nature of our minds & what I have been experimenting with.
I hope you find it interesting.
The other day I was reading the last post I wrote on my ‘A course in conscious living’ blog. I had written on ‘Creating your own happiness’. I felt like the writing came from a deep place and was full of wisdom. The post is dated Jan 22, 2021. To be honest with you, since Jan 22, 2021, to now I would have read a million books and done a million courses on expanding awareness to strengthening mindfulness practice to how to be happier. Ok, one million is an exaggeration, but you get my point.
I began wondering why? I seemed to already have all the answers, then what was I running after? I started to introspect into this behaviour and recognized the part of my mind that was doing the running as the ‘egoic mind’. I started to pay more attention to its nature.
And these are some of my observations:
✨ The egoic mind is never satisfied. There is always something more to do, more to achieve, more to be before it can be happy.
✨ The egoic mind sees separation. It favors competition, comparison and one-upping others so it can feel important.
✨ The egoic mind fears disapproval & rejection and is thereby afraid to make mistakes, & to say something or do something that will make it look bad in the eyes of others.
✨ Egoic mind seeks validation, praise, applause. And this need is insatiable.
✨ Egoic mind is fearful. Even though it takes action it comes from a place of wanting to prove itself.
✨ Egoic mind pushes us towards that which will make us look good but doesn’t have the capacity to satisfy us deeply.
In contrast:
✨ The wise mind is simply happy being.
✨ The wise mind seeks connection. It sees more similarities than differences with others.
✨ The wise mind isn’t afraid to make mistakes as its worth is not dependent on being right or wrong.
✨ The wise mind doesn’t care for applause. It knows it’s already enough. And there is nothing to prove to anyone.
✨ Wise mind is courageous and willing to take action.
✨ Wise mind nudges us towards that which will satisfy our deepest yearnings.
Some Realizations:
⭐ I realised that we could give power to only one of these minds at a time, so it could express itself and drive our life.
⭐ I realised that we had the choice to switch who was in the driver’s seat depending on the circumstance.
⭐ We each of us, not just me, has this power.
To harness this power, I have been focusing on a few practices to do:
A. A daily meditation practice:
A simple breath focused practice to cultivate focused attention and open awareness.
B. A tool called ‘Wheel of awareness’:
This is different from the ‘Wheel of Awareness’ for interpersonal relationships that I spoke about in an earlier post. This one is conceived by Dr. Daniel Siegel, and I have been finding it very transformational. I will leave the name of the book from where I learnt this practice in the reference section of this post in case this is something that piques your curiosity & you would like to explore.
My Experiments:
As an ongoing experiment I have begun to:
A. Pay attention to when my egoic mind is in control and see if I can make the switch to wise mind before reacting from the egoic place. Of course, I am not always successful and end up reacting and then reflecting later, but that’s part of the journey.
B. Pay attention to how I feel when the wise mind is in charge Vs when the egoic mind is in charge.
C. Notice & recognize from where other people’s responses are coming from - place of egoic mind or wise mind.
D. Recognise wise mind/ soul language vs Egoic language.
All this talk makes the ego look like the enemy, isn’t it? But that’s not true. We need a healthy ego to have a clear identity of ourselves, be assertive, to stand up for ourselves, fight for our rights when required, to have healthy boundaries and go after personal goals. But it’s when we let the egoic mind take full control of running our lives without recognizing that it has & when our egoic responses don’t serve us or those around us is when there is a problem.
The whole premise of conscious living is knowing how our actions impact us and those around us. Each of us have these 2 minds working in us and we get to decide which one will be in the driver’s seat when. Our decision will impact how we respond to the different life situations that we encounter & the results we experience.
Would you be interested in joining me in these experiments? Post in comments or write back. True learning happens through discussions, sharing of experiences and deeper conversations.
For today instead of quotes I am going to leave you with a few soulful verses by Khalil Gibran taken from his book, The Prophet. Hope you enjoy.
“You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
For what are your possessions but things you keep and guard for fear you may need them tomorrow? And to-morrow, what shall to-morrow bring to the over-prudent dog burying bones in the trackless sand as he follows the pilgrims to the holy city?
And what is fear of need but need itself? Is not dread of thirst when your well is full, the thirst that is unquenchable?
There are those who give little of the much which they have - and they give it for recognition and their hidden desire makes their gifts unwholesome. And there are those who have little and give it all. These are the believers in life and the bounty of life, and their coffer is never empty.
There are those who give with joy, and that joy is their reward. And there are those that give with pain, and that pain is their baptism.
It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give unasked, through understanding.
And to the open-handed the search for one who shall receive is joy greater than giving. And is there aught you would withhold?
All you have shall someday be given.
Therefore, give now, that the season of giving may be yours and not your inheritors.”
References:
Aware: The Science & Practice of Meditation by Dr. Daniel Siegel
Good One Puri....D.E.P.T.H
So leaving a cryptic comment here too... still waters run deep 🌊🧘♂️