Living life with freedom & ease
3 tools you can use daily to achieve this
Freedom & ease are two values that are important for me. And I find that applying the following 3 tools on a daily basis helps me stay true to them:
1. Forgiveness : Forgiving not just others but myself.
Many things come up for us during the day where we question our actions - "Did I do the right thing?" or "did I make a fool of myself" or "could I have acted or done something differently?" When this happens to me, I remind myself, that as a human I am allowed to make mistakes. It's ok to err, learn and course correct my actions in the future.
When I am on my death bed and look back on my life ( I know that's a morbid thought but it helps me get a better perspective ) I think I will be ok having made some mistakes & in the process learnt something than having stifled my freedom of expression for fear of rejection / fear of failure / for the sake of societal approval or whatever else.
I also find that the more forgiving I am with myself, the more forgiving I tend to be with others.
And by forgiving others I do not mean condoning their actions. I mean not letting other people's negative behaviour affect our hearts and weigh us down. We can and should set healthy boundaries. But beyond that carrying resentment does not help . It is best dropped & the heart kept light & free❤️
2. Cultivating empowering beliefs : 2 beliefs that help me are :
A. Things are not as they appear : We are quick to make assumptions based on what we see. But the truth is there are many stories hidden behind those "smiling pictures", "before after’s" & "perfect lives" that we have no clue about.
So everytime I find myself unfairly comparing myself with others or judging, I am reminded of this belief. And that puts me back at ease almost immediately.
B. Universe has my back : I see life as a wonderful teacher and the universe as a loving parent. Giving us exactly what we need at the right time.
Victor Frankl in his book, Man's search for meaning, says “Instead of asking what's the purpose of life ask what's life asking of you”. This struck a chord with me.
We all have our particular set of challenges for a reason. The choice to lament or grow through them is ours.
And when we look at life with this perspective , we are no longer afraid. We can be at ease in the face of difficulties and get curious about what life is trying to teach us. In no way is this easy but it provides some solace in the way we perceive the difficulty & handle it.
3. Practicing Gratitude : Neuroscience tells us that "Neurons that fire together, wire together”. Looking at the bright side on a regular basis can help create a positive mindset. Just as building muscles requires that we lift weights regularly, building the mental muscle of gratitude requires that we have a consistent practice.
Paying lip service, or reading a whatsapp forward on gratitude once in a while is not going to help bring a lasting change to our mindset. What we really need is a solid practice of taking the time to reflect on things to be grateful for or writing down in a journal 5 things to be grateful for on a daily basis. Only that is going to help rewire the brain. Nothing else.
I will be completing 4 years of Gratitude Journaling this year ❤️ And I can totally vouch for the practice adding ease into my life. It is one of my keystone habits.
These are my 3 tools. What about you? Are freedom and ease important values for you? If yes, what are the tools you use to stay true to them? Let me know in comments. I would love to hear your thoughts.